Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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