so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
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