So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize