whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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