I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Randomize
