I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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