is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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