I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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