I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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