I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Randomize
