when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
