Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Randomize
