Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize