Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
