I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
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