At least make sure they are 18
Why
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
