Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
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