What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Randomize
