I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
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