You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Randomize