You work out of a Hotel?
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Someone came in the potted fern
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize