What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
