her vagine was all disorganized.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
