D3 body, D1 cock
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
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