I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
