Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
They took my balls.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Randomize
