There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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