its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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