I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize