Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
