i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Randomize
