Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I will pee on everything he values.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
