if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
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