the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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