So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I didn't notice because vodka
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
