it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
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