Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
