That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
