Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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