I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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