Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
try to milk me bitch
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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