I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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