it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
so that wasnt chicken after all
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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