His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
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