you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bit a glass in half.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize