he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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