I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
