Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
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