Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize