we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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